Open Hand

“We can’t be afraid of change. You may feel very secure in the pond that you are in, but if you never venture out of it, you will never know that there is such a thing as an ocean, a sea. Holding onto something that is good for you now, may be the very reason why you don’t have something better.”
C. JoyBell C.

I am moving into a new office space.  I have been in my current office for three years and moved everything from another office occupied for about six years and another one for about three. If my math is correct, I have almost twelve years of accumulated stuff.  I will assure you that everything in my office is of great significance.  At least it was at some point and time.

This morning I discovered the following items:

  • One very large binder filled with evacuation and resettlement information for Hurricane Katrina and Rita.
  • Four different training manuals for the same training that have changed each year.
  • Information from a committee for the years 2002-2010.
  • Every piece of paper from conferences over the past twelve years including schedules, class times, presenter information, ..you get the idea.  Conferences included Atlanta, Jacksonville, Baltimore, Cincinnati, Litchfield Beach (3), Charleston (3), Columbia, and Greenville.
  • Emergency Preparedness plans for the years 2003-2010.  They change each year too.
  • A Volunteer Administrators Guide that was created by our local board for a group.  The guide has not been used for at least eight years.
  • Business cards from people who no one remembers.
  • Three video cassette tapes..yes tapes.  One is labeled and the others not.  I don’t have a video cassette player.
  • Spanish for Office Personnel Book from a course I took eight years ago. I remember very little of it.
  • Six old calendars because they have pretty pictures.
  • 8000 pens (OK that may be an exaggeration) Most don’t work. But they have logos from somewhere.

I haven’t finished going through my office yet.  A friend is coming to help me.  She is very efficient and throws away everything.  I started before she arrived because I wanted to hide a few things from her. When I moved into a new house in 2002, she came over to help me and things started flying into bags and boxes.  I kept protesting but they kept disappearing.  I don’t remember any of the things we gave or threw away.   I didn’t even remember many of them the first time I found unpacking.

One of my favorite books is “God on a Harley.”  Yes, it is a sappy little book that can be read in about an hour or so if you are a fast reader, but it is filled with bits of wisdom.    Here are the rules for living from that book:
Rules To Live By

1. Do not build walls, for they are dangerous. Learn to transcend them.

 2. Live in the moment, for each one is precious and not to be squandered.

 3. Take care of yourself first and foremost.

 4. Drop the ego, be real.

 5. All things are possible all of the time.

 6. When someone gives, it is an act of generosity to receive. For in giving there is something gained.

 When the protagonist Christine was told to clean out her closet and house to move into a smaller place, she balked at every step.   She insisted she needed to keep size six jeans that hadn’t been worn in years because of the memories.  They weren’t even good memories.   She had to learn to let go of the old before she could receive the new.

I find that to be true in my life.   I have to let go of the old fear, the old anger, the past, the old haunting memories.  It isn’t easy to do.   I remember doing an exercise where I held a penny tight in my fist.  I then put my hand into a jar of change.  I was told I could keep as much as I could pull out, but I couldn’t let go of the penny.  I came out with the just the penny.  The next time I was told to let go of the penny and I was able to pull out many coins.

Maybe that is the lesson I am supposed to learn right now.  I am in the process of letting go of two very important things in my life.  It is painful at times, scary at others, and yet in moments I catch just a bit of excitement and wonder at what is to come next.

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19 responses

  1. very good analogy with the penny. BTW, you wouldn’t want me helping you move, I throw away anything that doesn’t move for a week! lol

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    1. LOL That would scare me. 🙂

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  2. Can I borrow your friend? I have good intentions and poor follow-through re: clutter.

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    1. She would love to come throw your stuff away. LOL I don’t know why but your comments keep going to my spam. I only clean it out once a week or so and your comments sit there until I go to it. 😦 Don’t know how to fix it.

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  3. I liked what you said about having to let go of the old to receive the new. This last week has been an exercise in that very thing as I let go of my old resentments and anger about my ‘old mom’ and received healing with my ‘new mom’. I’m in the process of a multi part blog on that as I process it all. Your move is so symbolic of many things in our lives. Wishing you all the best as you and your friend sort and purge. 🙂

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  4. I wanted you to know that I have chosen you for The Very Inspiring Blogger Award. You can see the details about your nomination on my blog Here’e the thing. If you accept the award please note there are rules. ~Thank the person who nominated you and link back to them in your post. ~Share 7 interesting things about yourself. ~Nominate 7 bloggers you admire. ~Leave a comment on each of the blog’s letting them know they have been nominated.

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    1. Thank you so much.

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  5. Cathy,
    I can SO relate to this post!
    It is quite timely for me right now. (Did you plan that? 😉 )
    Thank you for using your authentic self to encourage and speak into the hearts of others.
    Today, you met me right where I am.

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    1. Joy, If I had planned it, we would be so out of sync. LOL I love knowing others are on the same path.

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  6. we give thanks for this post, you are creating space for the new to come in….creating the peace for the new to emerge!

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    1. 🙂 Thank you

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  7. Excellent post, Cathy, and very timely for me! Thanks for reinforcing what I know deep down. Change is scary, but change is good. And letting go of the old, will bring in new! Must remember that daily.

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  8. I still feel as if I’m stuck in part of the darkness that I experienced as a kid. Reading your’s and others blogs are helping me realize that I’m not along.
    With all the best…
    Phoenix

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    1. Thanks Phoenix
      You are not alone, it just feels that way sometimes. My therapist always says, feeling don’t have brain cells. They are just feelings.
      If you are stuck for today, just be OK with it and make baby steps to moving past it.
      Cathy

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      1. Thanks so much Cathy. I appreciate the advice.
        Phoenix

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  9. I am inspired by your stories as are so many others. I have nominated you for the “Sisterhood of the World Bloggers Award”. If you choose to participate, details are at Nine Writes.

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    1. Thank you so much. I really appreciate it..

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